Out of Solitude Henry Nouwen
Friday February 12, 2010
Reflect on lonely places.
I am aware that without solitude my very life is in danger. I need silence so words don’t loose their meaning and I need listen, so when I speak my words can bring healing, I need distance so I can revel in closeness. I crave solitude. I like wide open spaces. I like time to reflect and write and read and I start to feel crazy if I don’t get it. I need to get out into nature. I need trips. I need get away. I always feel more centered after a weekend at the farm or at Algonquin.
What I also find, is if I don’t get my space, if I don’t make time to steel away to a lonely place and pray, I don’t like who I become. I am less able to care for others well. I become increasingly needy and demanding. I start to keep track or score or things I’m doing and whether others are doing likewise for me. I don’t do these things intensionally. They just start creeping into my life.
In the stillness of solitude answers come. Feelings are set free. Realizations happen. Growth happens. Sheer unadulterated honesty with myself happens, sometimes at least. It reminds me that being is much more important than doing, although I remain motivated. It reminds me that being is more important than having. And I know, despite my recent lists and motivation to live with purpose and intension that I am worth so much more than the results of my efforts.
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